Different Strokes for Different Folks

Living in my little single bubble I forget how it is to be married (duh).  Until something happens and jolts me back to some women's reality.

Recently a few of us gals (I'm being vague to protect this gal's identity) wanted to go in on a gift for someone, an expensive gift and the amount was over $100 each split 5 ways.   As usual I sent out emails to all the gals ( our preferred method of communicating) for them not for me, but I sent out an email letting everyone know that so-and-so, has been there through life events, bearing gifts and support, and now it's his turn.  He recently purchased a home, and was in need of some kitchen appliances.  I thought it would be cool to go in on a new refrigerator as a housewarming gift.  If we chipped in $100 per person we could buy him one.

So married gal had to get "permission" from hubby, not only that, she basically diverted me to said hubby in order to ask him directly, as in her words  " everything that has to do with hubby's family, must be filtered through the hubby"  as in her words " he doesn't like my family, so I make him deal with his"  apparently a bit of a "tit for tat" going on here.

When I was married to a control freak, he hated my family as well as his, so rather than me being a "tit for tat" gal, I just did all of it. I was the go to person on both sides of the family, and I didn't mind.  I was mature enough to recognize that I was the woman, and women general conduct the social business in most families so therefore took up my societal role.  I don't understand some people's logic, or communication styles, but I do know when I'm being ignored and through my endless persistence well, we got her to contribute!

People keep forgetting I'm a professional sales person, and I don't give up easily, if you don't want to contribute just say " no " and I'll write you off as a cheap ass hole!  But, never ignore a sales person, you won't get any rest until you come up with an answer!  ha-ha!

(on a side note, they make plenty of money, so it's not a financial issue, but an I'm a stingy cheap ass religious person issue) 

These petty issues, make me grateful for the way I was raised, to share, and help out my fellow man.... I'd rather donate to a worthy cause, then give 10% of all my earnings to a religious organization so they can build overpriced Temples, and fancy pants shopping malls, and buy more businesses!  

Sigh

My nonsensical employer has me scratching my head yet again!

You see I applied for a position last fall, a recruiting coordinator, I had some of the qualifications on the list and needed 1-3 years of actual recruiting experience. I applied anyway and got declined instantly, no interview, no call, just a pre-determined "form email" of sorts, saying thanks, but no thanks!

 So fast forward to today, I've since enrolled in some college courses, brushed up on my Excel spread sheet stuff, read informative books on career, and the work place, namely how to get ahead at work.

  Then the other day I see the same job posted yet again on the jobs board.  So I inquire about it with my manager, about getting Excel installed on my laptop so I can brush up on it. I get the old "oh... go speak with IT".... they said  "I don't know....go see someone in HR"  so me running from person to person cause they're all passing the buck in my opinion, I go int the HR office. Here is how the conversation goes:

 me:  " Hi Grant you have a second?"
Grant: " Yes come in"
me: so that recruiter position is open again, and I've been taking classes, and have most all of the qualifications for that position, I'd even be willing to take more classes if I can get to my goal of being a recruiter, but it's difficult because the job I do now, in no way prepares me for this next step."
Grant:  "Well to be honest the classes don't really matter, I know Russ (hiring guy) and he's pretty straight forward, with no prior experience he'll just tell you no, you don't qualify."
me:  "So let me see if I understand this.... the only way to get that position, is if I quit working here... and get hired on by a company I've never worked for, as a recruiter, work there for 1-3 years, then apply back here at this company right?"
Grant: "Yep, that's pretty much what you'd have to do."

My thoughts I keep to myself:   Ummmm...... makes perfect sense to me, hire someone from outside the company, with no proven track record, no tenure, no clue how they'll work out, and allow them to make hiring decisions without knowing diddly squat about the storage industry.....just as long as they've been a recruiter for 1-3 years it's all good.... vs, promoting me, with 6 years of dependable, adaptable, teachable proven track record, knows damn near everything about the storage industry and the koo koo bird culture and protocol here......oh and ranked #2  out of 70 sales agents for the 2nd consecutive month in a row..AND won an award for working so freaking hard......but .......OKAY!
 It says a lot as to why our churn rate is way above the target goal of 30%!

Hiking The Rocky Mountain Range

The oldest and I love to hike.  Each summer we plan out day hikes we can take to get in touch with nature and also get to know each other better as well.  This year is no different.  We began our hiking routine again last weekend when we decided to hike up Mill - D trail up to Dog lake.

It was a beautiful hike up Big Cottonwood Canyon just above our home.   It was so green and lush, and the smell of the pine tree forest was just so refreshingly pleasant.  We hiked up a stead incline for 2.5 miles the last stretch was the worst of it 20 minutes of full on up hill hiking.   I really had to push myself to make it up the steep incline, and my legs were burning!  It was worth it though, because the lake was clear and so pretty, and an adolescent moose came down from the trees to drink from the lake right next to us.  It was such a pretty day, after we got down the mountain, we decided to go to Sapa for Sushi it was sooo yum, yum, yummy, we filled up on delicious sushi rolls and then rolled on home.

What a great day, here are some pic's of the hiking trail. 

Texting

Texting can be a double edged sword, and a complete annoyance to me.  It's great for quick info from family, and friends....but put a classified ad out into cyber space with a cell number and all the Koo Koo Birds come out to play!


Maybe I'm just getting old, but sometimes I find texting a royal pain in the ass.  Take last night, I have a car for sale and put an ad on a classified website page.  Some ding-a-ling calls the land line, I run upstairs to answer the ringing phone it's a message it said:  "Please hold for a text to land line voice message"   I hang up and hear my cell alert go off, text message.  The guy and I are texting back and forth, he's asking all sorts of questions about the car, and I'm typing on a teeny tiny keypad ( felt like a novel)    I though to myself :  Is texting just a Chicken Shit way to avoid speaking to someone?   Why are people so leery about calling and talking to an actual person?  The texting back and forth took 20 minutes, when in fact if the guy had the balls to just call his questions could have been answered in 2 minutes.

I view people who text instead of calling as  cowards!  Too chicken to call and talk to someone, maybe they have social anxiety or something I don't know really know but it's a head scratch-er

!

Free Time

Every now and then, I get someone who will ask me "What do you do in your free time?"   I find this a strange, yet annoying question.

What is the motive behind it?  Are they asking because I'm single, and they're not?  or because they can't think of anything fun to do in their free time, so they're trying to gain ideas?  or they're just nosy?  I don't know because I've never really asked someone this stupid question before!   So for the record, here is what I do for fun as a single middle aged woman who works 40+ hours a week!

1- GYM TIME- that includes yoga, Zumba, fitness classes, swimming, and hot-tub/steam-room sitting
2-Tennis ( lessons, games, and workouts)
3- Shopping either by myself, or with a friend
4- Dinners out with friends/dates
5- Concerts, and musical entertainment shows
6- Movies
7- Hiking/walking/bike-riding
8- Reading
9- Meditating
10- Gourmet cooking/baking
11- Taking 2 online courses from Harvard!  (Yeah!)

I love going downtown and exploring new places, I love to curl up and read, in the summer I find a sunny or shady space usually on my lounge chair on my deck and read the afternoon away.  These are all things I like doing in my free time.  I have a pool so in the summertime I have pool parties, and swim for fitness and fun.

I have a large 2500 square foot condo, and as a single person that's a lot of cleaning and maintenance. I do most the work myself, I paint, decorate, make things for the house, refurbish old pieces of furniture, by sanding and painting them in my garage, sometimes I sell pieces for extra income.  I love spending free time puttering around the house making things nice and cozy.  I sew my own pillows, draperies, and other decorative things, I made my own cornice boxes, and installed them, I install all my own window treatments and anything else I need hung, assembled, or installed I do it myself.

I own 2 cars, I get them repaired, or change out the oil, if it's broken I fix it.  I have 2 cats that require a small amount of work, making sure they have food, water, tracking them down if they're lost outside, playing with them.  I have 2 kids, who are very independent but at least once or twice a week require attention from me, for rides, shopping trips, help with resume's bank accounts you name it.

My Condo takes up a lot of my time, just the cleaning, deck maintenance, and garage stuff gobbles up all my free time.  In other words, I'm a full time employee, and a full time homemaker/Mom/repair person.... oh .... and during the summer months I have a little pool maintenance gig on the side.  I wake early before the pool opens up for the day and clean it.  Decks, chairs, and vacuum it all,  check water samples, repair what is broken... you get the idea!

I do all this stuff myself, I don't delegate it out to others, or boss people around, I love the process, the learning part of it as well as the satisfaction of doing things myself, and not just paying someone to do work for me.

I'm always busy with something, so that's why I find this question so odd!  Another thing I do is mind my own business, so you'll never catch me asking someone   "Hey what do you do in your free time?"  Just to be nosy, or who knows what the motive is Seriously!  Sometimes depending on who's asking I think they are just phishing for information,  or they assume because I'm single I sit at home all day and night twiddling my thumbs or something!  Which if that's the motive, that annoys me even more, because single people are the busiest around! ....I wish if they want me to do something with them, just ASK!   I hate people who are vague and call you up to say "Hey what are you doing?" So you tell them, and they really called to see if you wanted to go somewhere with them.  Just ASK!  Because if you ask me what I"m doing, well, I'm ALWAYS doing something interesting, and if your invite is MORE interesting, then you may have a date!   But don't be vague about it, just ASK!

                           
                           One of many favorite hiking spots, up at Snowbird Ski Resort!  Love it up there!

The Universal Law of Attraction is working in my favor

I've been asking the universe to please make my son (18) be nicer to me, he's usually nasty, rude and completely self absorbed…… pretty typical behavior unfortunately!  

I've been thinking these thoughts for a week or so… envisioning peace and harmony… He blew my mind today. 

He wanted to borrow my car (his is in the shop) to take his GF out to lunch, then for a walk down Dimple Dell Trail…. I'm off in 2 hours and want my car when I'm off, so I tell him, yes, but please be back by 3:30 today.

They don’t show up till  4:30…. one hour late, now usually when stuff like this happens, I call him out on it, and he yells at me, and we get into it…and all hell breaks loose…I end up hating him, and wishing he'd move the hell out! ......instead... today, I though nice positive thoughts, practiced the secret…. and knew he'd be back soon with my car safe and sound!  Then instead of getting anxiety over it, racked with worry about what the ding-a-ling is doing with my beautiful car….. I relaxed and told myself….."it's a nice day, go outside and spray paint those ugly gold picture frames you bought at the thrift store weeks ago, and get that project checked of your to do list!" ...."Everything will be fine, your beautiful, luxurious, Camry will be back soon safe and sound!"

He comes in the house at 4:30 I just go about my business not saying anything to him…(the exact opposite of what I usually do… normally I'd storm downstairs all butt hurt by his blatant disregard for my time and property!!!)

He says to me in a calm polite voice…… "Hey Mom….. sorry about being an hour late, I was careful with the car, and I won't do it again"…   " We wanted to go to the library too but we didn't because I thought you'd be mad at us for doing that without asking you first"………….

I about dropped my jaw!  Who are you????  Wait….. it's the Secret working it's magic on my family!  Hee Hee Hee….   MIND BLOWING!    I then gave him permission to take it to the library….

I've been nagging him to do his laundry for weeks, and he's lazy, and has dirty clothes all over his room, and in baskets in my laundry room piling up everywhere driving me cray cray!!  So today as I took out my clothes from the dryer, I asked the universe to please get my son to do his dirty clothes today, and I believed he would with all my mind... I kid you not! ...This very moment as I'm typing this I hear him start a load of laundry!  WTF???  

WOW, I'm blown away!  

                        ASK, BELIEVE, RECEIVE!  

My house is messy and I don't give a flying "BLEEP"

Oh my!  It's been a crazy month.  Usually I'm very neat and tidy, but lately I'm running from morning till night, cleaning up a smidge here and a spot there, but no time for my usually Saturday off, all day Clean-a-Thon!

You see I've been working hard, and doing overtime like to the tune of 50 hours per week!  Then in my free time I'm either blogging, FaceBooking, Pinteresting stuff, Texting people...driving my son around (his car is broken down) and he needs rides everywhere. Coupon-ing, cooking, and laundry!

Hanging out with his new girlfriend while he's at work, Wheeler Farm, IKEA for new bedding Shopping, doing hair and feet stuff, reading, studying stuff, keeping up with the Kardashians, Honey BOO BOO, and of course the Andy Cohen and the Real housewives series!  Going to the gym, walking the neighborhood, chatting it up with neighbors I haven't seen all winter calling .... friends, family, helping my friend move to California, house sitting stuff like that.  Today was so sunny and warm I wasted even more time by putting a leash on my cat, and walking him around outside for a half hour or so so he can enjoy the out of doors too!

Needless to say, all this activity and my house is a mess!  YUCK! So I'm off tomorrow, and wanted to get up to the gym while I'm on a roll, baby's 18 doesn't have to work till 1:30 PM, and I have a few hours in the morning to work my house stuff, then my friend FB'd me wants to go out to lunch.... .guess the house will be messy one more day, as after lunch, is carpool, then mom's birthday dinner, and it's payday so I must pay bills, and run errands and so forth!

Being single can be exhausting, because nobody to delegate your work to.  I was hoping to call a furnace fix it guy, as Mr, heater is on the fritz again, I have a leak in my shower knobs, baby's car is in need of attention, and I'm just trying to keep my head above water!

  Guess a quick round the room pick up, and I'm off!
Still working tonight as I type this blog, it's my 8PM night
 I scratch my head and wonder how I do it all!
Don't come to my house till next weekend, as the forecast calls for messy, dirty, and cluttery all week long!